Dear future child
If it’s 3am and you find yourself in a world of complete despair
Please do not turn to strangers on the internet for solace as I did
Please climb onto my bed
And I will hold you until the demons sleep
If it is Thursday morning and you are too sad to move
I won’t force you
I will buy ice cream and we will watch your favourite tv show and I will remind you of your importance
If you feel as if you have no purpose
I will remind you that you were created entirely with love and every pain you feel, I feel too
When you’re sure you can’t go on anymore
I will tell you that when I was 21 I searched for peace at the bottom of a vodka bottle chased by a bottle of pain killers
But that five years later
When you were placed in my arms in the delivery room
I realised that you were why I had been holding on
Without realising it, you saved me, do you know how amazing that is?
So if you ever feel like grabbing that vodka bottle, put it down, we will get in the car and I will drive until the sky turns magenta
I will show you how the sun rises every morning to encourage you to rise too
Sweetheart I refuse to be unaware of your sufferings
As my mother was to mine.

— Your mental health is my priority. (via be-fearless-brave-and-kind)

You can’t be sad, you can’t be anything when you’re empty. I feel numb. I guess I refuse to acknowledge the pain, the struggle. I wanted to hate life. I wanted to hate myself. Or maybe I hated it already.

I don’t know what life would bring to me and I don’t want to know anymore. Maybe I’ll be stuck with this routine I have in my so-called life. And I realized it’s true, routine is lethal.

It happened. The thing I fear the most happened. I’ve been pushed in the world of isolation. I only have no one. It’s hard. Myself is also giving up on me. Getting through the needle’s hole is not as hard as having a gigantic hole in front of you but you are too paralyzed to carry on.

This time, all i wanted is the end of this agony. Be filled or be slashed.

ps. this is a rant not a suicide note


-C-

You changed my whole world

with just a blink of an eye

and that is something 

I could never deny.

.

When you’re around me

it seems like everything shines

feels like I’ve won something

for the millionth time.


Yes, they do. 


What matters most is that you loved.
Ibigay mo ang lahat ng pagmamahal na kaya mong ibigay dahil yun naman ang importante. Alam mo sa sarili mo na hindi ka nagkulang.. Ang masakit lang na part dun, binibigay mo na nga lahat pero hindi pa rin sapat.



oliviamaest:

 

eeeeeeeeee



Title: Grow Up With Me (Poem)
Artist: Keaton Henson
Played: 75283 times

kulangotsapisngi:

Grow Up With Me- Keaton Henson

Grow up with me

Let’s run in fields and fear the dark together
Fall off swings and burn special things
And both play outside in bad weather
Let’s eat badly
Let’s watch adults drink wine and laugh at their idiocy
Let’s sit in the back of the car,
Making eye contact with strangers driving past
Making them uncomfortable
Not caring, not swearing, don’t fuck
Let’s both reclaim our superpowers
The ones we all have and lose with our milk teeth
The ability not to fear social awkwardness
To panic when locked in the cellar
Still sure there’s something down there
And while picking from pillows each feather
Let’s both stay away from the edge of the bed
Forcing us closer together
Let’s sit in public, with ice cream all over both our faces
Sticking our tongues out at passers by
Let’s cry
Let’s swim
Let’s everything
Let’s not find it funny lest someone falls over
Classical music is boring
Poetry baffles us both
There’s nothing that’s said is what’s meant
Plays are long, tiresome, sullen and filled
With hours that could be spent rolling down hills
And grazing our knees on cement
Let’s hear stories and both lose our innocence
Learn about parents and forgiveness
Death and morality
Kindness and art
Thus losing both of our innocent hearts
But at least we won’t do it apart.



“But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.”





Take pictures, screenshot and voilà! Instant collage! Happy 2014!


Maybe I should write a book entitled “How to Lose Everyone Around You”.